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Classic Facebook Status Quotes:
- Take photos of friends with their face squished against glass. Assign to your phone contacts; it’ll look like they’re trapped inside your phone!
- Sometimes I think Facebook is trying to insult me by some of its friend suggestions.
- Your girlfriend should never be jealous of another woman. Instead, you should do your best to make other women jealous of her.
- That awkward moment when you don’t know what to do with your life when you leave the computer, so you just get back on.
- Creating a nickname for your crush that only you and your best friend know.
- That awkward moment when you’re not sure if your phone isn’t sending texts, or if all your friends are ignoring you.
- One of the greatest feelings is knowing you made someone smile.
- Finding out your ex got fat is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. Not life changing but definitely puts a smile on your face.
- That scary moment when you feel like someone was right behind you cause air was blowing fast.
- I wake up from my nap planning to be productive and then a voice in my head says “Haha good one” and we laugh and laugh and fall back asleep.
- Sitting in your towel for ages because you’re too lazy to get dressed.
- I love it when people call me at 3 AM. “Hey, are you asleep?” “No, I’m skydiving.”
- I see you’re playing “stupid” again. Looks like you’re winning too.
- One day I want to be “Let’s Just Take My Helicopter” rich.
- I need to get out of bed and do something so I can justify taking a nap later.
- Hamburger Helper only works, if the hamburger is ready to accept that it needs help.
- I’m pretty sure I could start a new life with only the crap in my car.
- Looking back at the past and realizing what a idiot you were.
- Looking at graffiti on a bridge: Some people: that’s vandalism! Other people: that’s some dope art! Me: how the hell did they get up there?
- NASA has confirmed that May 21, late afternoon, the sky will be very dark. It is an interesting phenomenon called “night.”
Yesterdays Status Updates… | Free Timeline Covers
Judging Kitty:
He knows what you’re doing on the interwebs…. dat browser history!
Greatest Soccer Goal Ever:
That.Was.Intense. Pretty funny :) Share if you liked!
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