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Daily Facebook Status Update
We allllll know you lack creativity so here ya go:
What’s all this jibberish about people having to find themselves? Don’t they realize all they need is a compass, a map, or a GPS system?
Virgins just don’t know what they’re missing!
All a passport really says is that someone was able to PASS through all the security [...]
5 More inGenius Status Updates
The daily fix of funny facebook Status Updates:
I’m on the “Starts tomorrow” diet.
I too can’t believe that it’s not butter.
Whats the deal with all this Facebook Hacking? Where are we Myspace, jeeez!
iTunes just suffered a major melt down. I now have noTunes.
Leadership: [...]
How to Link your Twitter Account to your Facebook.
Want to link your Twitter account to Facebook so that your status updates sync? Easy, here’s how:
Step 1: Search for “Twitter” in Facebook’s search field.
Step 2: The first result should be the one you are looking for. It is the application “Twitter.” Click “view application”
Step 3: Add the Twitter Facebook [...]
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FML
- Anonymous says FMLToday, while cleaning my car, I found my mother's underwear in the backseat. She'd borrowed my car last weekend because hers had been in the shop and she'd been called in to work. I see she put in for overtime. FML […]
- Anonymous says FMLToday, while at the dog park, I suddenly had to use the bathroom really badly. Since there weren't any facilities nearby, I decided to go behind a tree and relieve myself there. While doing this, two other owners, one that's in my math class, noticed me, regardless of me hiding. She definitely saw everything. School will be fun tomorrow. FML […]
- Anonymous says FMLToday, I became that small percent of people who face three different kinds of complications after their wisdom teeth are removed. FML […]
- heartless says FMLToday, my mom told me she can't wait for me to turn eighteen so she can turn my room into a place for her to display all her antique glass dolls. FML […]
- anonymous says FMLToday, I found out that my art project, the one I've been working on for the last two weeks and the first piece I felt really comfortable about turning in, was stolen out of the art cupboard. FML […]
Texts From Last Night
- (415): There are two people having...(415): There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms. […]
- (805): my dad just walked in on my...(805): my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad. […]
- (936): he kept asking me "do...(936): he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him. (812): and...? (936): I told him it was alright. […]
- (440): I did my dad and i had to...(440): I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee (1-440): please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation. […]
- (217): you kept yelling at her to...(217): you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals... (1-217): please don't ever take me to a strip club again... […]
Pages
User Submitted Status Updates
: I got banned to use FB for posting "Facebook have no life" as status
: google just added "get biking directions" on google maps, this economy is getting worse.
: just got a message from the police... my mum got stuck in the grocery store snd starved to death
: life was much simple when ; blackberry and apple were just only fruits 
: wants to know would you want her to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
: is holding a voodoo doll that looks just like you.
: bronte what are you talking about? lol
: is so broke that he cant even afford the last letter to update his STATU_
: hey i forgot your name can i call u mine?
: Is taking her pet fish on a walk .
: stole the freaking cookie from the cookie jar. Now get over it.
: Roses are red Viloets are blue, god made me pretty what the h### happened to you
: h said it was kinda like eating tofo
: just spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said concentrate
: Is joining the K Y Intimacy Challenge... Going it alone, pictures to follow!!!
» CLICK HERE & leave your own funny facebook status !!!