Funny Friday Facebook Status Updates
Posted on | September 11, 2009 | Comments Off
Today is often referred to as Funny Friday or Fiesta Friday depending on what office you work in.
Due to the nature of our funny / witty / clever status updates we give you the following gems:
- Is it wrong that I find Home Alone the greatest movie of all time?
-
Late one night a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into a path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs "give me your money," he demanded. Indignant, the affluent man replied, "you can't do this – I am a United States congressman!" "In that case," replied the mugger, "give me MY money."
- Jimmy crack corn and I don't care. No seriously, I don't care about jimmy nor his corn.
- My name is Benjamin Button, and I was born under unusual circumstances. While everyone else was agin', I was gettin' younger... all alone.
- Beefy.
Funny Friday Image:
Use URL: http://www.welcometopixelton.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/funny-pictures-of-cats-dot-info-011.jpg
Stop by tomorrow for more comedic facebook gold.
Facebook Status Updates
Posted on | September 10, 2009 | Comments Off
American (NFL) Football is Officially BACK!
Top 5 Status Updates of the Day:
- I wonder if Shawn Merriman performed the lights out after the incident?
- Da Bears!
- Halloween is coming... and you know what that means. An excuse for every girl to dress slutty and get away with it.
- Little known fact, Arnold Palmer (the guy not the drink) turned 80 today.
- Facebooked so hard that my keyboard just fell apart. FML!
Link of the Day:
The NFL enters The Tyson Zone
Video of the Day:
Check back tomorrow for more awesome FB Status Updates/Links/Videos and much muchhhhh more.
Funny Facebook Status Update Duex
Posted on | June 15, 2009 | Comments Off
What's it going to be today... how about these hilarious funny facebook status updates?
- Monday = suck.
- I wonder if ET feels really stupid now that cell phones exist? iPhone Home.
- I had a dream last night that MLK was having a dream but, instead of civil rights the dream was about a dinosaur named Samsonite.
- Selling oranges on the side of the road. Tough economic times call for interesting jobs.
- Is there any movie/TV-show Hollywood hasn't remade yet?
- Who farted?
Check back tomorrow for more awesome new funny facebook status updates. Until then win some money playing online poker:
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Facebook Usernames
Posted on | June 13, 2009 | Comments Off
As Facebook becomes more and more Twitter-like. They added the bonus feature of being able to have a Username. With your beautiful new facebook username you can pick a unique 5+letter handle that will supposedly make it easier for ppl to find you. So next time your at a bar you can tell someone to find you @ Facebook.com/EasySlutBag
Hundreds of thousands of the best Usernames were snatched up in a matter of minutes. Among them:
Facebook.com/Myspace
Facebook.com/Twitter
Facebook.com/InsertJokeHere
This DIGG Article highlights some good stuff about the new facebook usernames.
Hurry up and pick your unique username today because soon all the good ones will be all gone!
Here is our suggestion for you: Facebook.com/Akward (Still available at time of writing!)
With this awesome new feature, we also add a new feature. "Funny Facebook Usernames" where we will let you know some of the most humorous usernames we encounter.
Sphere: Related ContentTags: Facebook Usernames > funny facebook usernames > popular facebook usernames
Hump day status updates.
Posted on | June 3, 2009 | Comments Off
Funny Facebook Status Updates Anyone?
Ah, you there! You say you'd like some... Well here ya go little guy:
- I'm never drinking again.... And this time I mean it.
- The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
- It's really scary what you can find in your belly button. It's time like these I wish I had an outie.
- If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?
-
if my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN
Now, if those didn't provide you a laugh. Then you are probably just a bad human being in general.
Verry cool time lapse video for you to post a link to:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/72511036@N00/3500258467
Sphere: Related ContentTerrible Tuesday Status Updates…
Posted on | June 1, 2009 | Comments Off
You are 2/5th's the way through this week. Keep on trucking and it'll be Friday before you know it.
Meanwhile steal some Funny Facebook Status Updates from us:
- Parking spots are the sluts of the garage world.
- If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
- Why is the f*ck is the word abbreviation so long?
- I can't define irony;but, I know it when I see it.
- There are only three kinds of people; people who can count and people who can't.
Link of the day: Nasa Space Shuttle Atlantis launching in High Def.
Share that with your friends they will be blown away. Don't forget to tell them you found it @ FacebookStatus.org
Sphere: Related ContentVideo you have to embed!
Posted on | May 30, 2009 | Comments Off
Facebook Video
Here is an awesome video that will have all your friends commenting!
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SMorJXe5l4
Sphere: Related ContentDaily Facebook Status Update
Posted on | May 30, 2009 | Comments Off
We allllll know you lack creativity so here ya go:
- What's all this jibberish about people having to find themselves? Don't they realize all they need is a compass, a map, or a GPS system?
- Virgins just don't know what they're missing!
- All a passport really says is that someone was able to PASS through all the security at the airPORT.
- Lying is a key to survival.
- I think there's a huge conspiracy with the news media. They murder people and commit other crimes so that they can always have stories.
5 More inGenius Status Updates
Posted on | May 29, 2009 | Comments Off
The daily fix of funny facebook Status Updates:
- I'm on the "Starts tomorrow" diet.
- I too can't believe that it's not butter.
- Whats the deal with all this Facebook Hacking? Where are we Myspace, jeeez!
- iTunes just suffered a major melt down. I now have noTunes.
-
Leadership: The art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.
Dwight D. Eisenhower
How to Link your Twitter Account to your Facebook.
Posted on | May 28, 2009 | Comments Off
Want to link your Twitter account to Facebook so that your status updates sync? Easy, here’s how:
Step 1: Search for “Twitter” in Facebook’s search field.
Step 2: The first result should be the one you are looking for. It is the application “Twitter.” Click “view application”
Step 3: Add the Twitter Facebook Application.
Step 4: Choose your settings and add the Twitter Facebook Application to your profile.
Step 5: Enter your Twitter login information.
Step 6: Choose to have Twitter update your Facebook status.
Step 7: Allow and Authorize Access for Twitter to Facebook.
Step 8: That’s it! Now every time you update your Twitter, your Facebook status will update automatically.
Taken from AJ Vaynerchuk's Tutorial
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FML
- Anonymous says FMLToday, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert". Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML […]
- Anonymous says FMLToday, I started biting my nails, before I realized I'd forgotten to wash my hands after taking a massive dump. FML […]
- Jamie says FMLToday, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex when he stopped responding. Five minutes later and ready to hang up, he apologized because he got distracted with his game of Tetris. FML […]
- robotchickens says FMLToday, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML […]
- Nancy says FMLToday, I came home and noticed that sometime while I was at school, someone cut off half of my ponytail. FML […]
Texts From Last Night
- (413): i knew i liked her after...(413): i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way". […]
- (319): By connection do you mean...(319): By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection". […]
- (517): On my way home from Vegas....(517): On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out. […]
- (813): How am I a tease?
(1-813):...(813): How am I a tease? (1-813): Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away. (813): ONLY PART OF IT. […]
- (352): Pregaming for shuffle board...(352): Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break. […]
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User Submitted Status Updates
: just got a message from the police... my mum got stuck in the grocery store snd starved to death
: life was much simple when ; blackberry and apple were just only fruits 
: wants to know would you want her to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
: is holding a voodoo doll that looks just like you.
: bronte what are you talking about? lol
: is so broke that he cant even afford the last letter to update his STATU_
: hey i forgot your name can i call u mine?
: Is taking her pet fish on a walk .
: stole the freaking cookie from the cookie jar. Now get over it.
: Roses are red Viloets are blue, god made me pretty what the h### happened to you
: h said it was kinda like eating tofo
: just spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said concentrate
: Is joining the K Y Intimacy Challenge... Going it alone, pictures to follow!!!
: Is joining the K Y Intimacy Challenge... Going it alone, pictures to follow!
: I am soo hungry that when someone said it was chilly outside i went running out with my spoon!
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